Pineapples--to be, or not to be?

Hi Everyone!

I have had pineapples on my mind this week--the crochet stitch pattern, not the fruit-- and I was wondering if any of you know of a pattern that would be good to learn the stitch.

I LOVE how pineapples look, but I have actually never tried a pattern that uses them!  Of course, I also think that they look more like pinecones than pineapples...

So, anyone have a pattern they would recommend that uses pineapples?  I tried to look for some myself on Ravelry, but I got bored really quickly-- there are WAY too many pineapple-doily patterns! 
Really, does anyone expect me to crochet a lace doily that will never, ever be used?  I don't think so.
And of course, because I am incredibly impatient, I would want to get the the pineapple part of the pattern fast.  I'd rather not wait until row 23 to start on it. 
I think the criteria I have has just about canceled out every possibly pattern!  Maybe I just wasn't meant to crochet pineapples after all!  But, seriously, if anyone knows of one, leave me a comment!

What stitches are you using (or hoping to use!) this week?